Respite Care & Carers
The Unsung Heroes

BY PHILLIPA SAXTON

Carers of the elderly and sick are the unsung heroes of the
community. They save the tax payer dollars, they free-up
hospital and nursing home beds, they take the pressure off other family members and more importantly, they provide a loving home environment
for aged parents, friends and relatives.

Peace of Mind looks at the lives and responsibilities of carers, the assistance offered to carers by the community and government
(both financial and psychological) and what choices are available for these special people to take a well-earned break.

Carers of the sick and elderly are usually family members or friends who provide support to children or adults who have a disability, mental illness, chronic condition or who are frail aged. Carers can be parents, partners,
brother, sister, friends or children of any age.

Carers may care for a few hours a week, or all day every day.
Care recipients can fall into many categories, from the mildly needy to totally dependent.

Care recipients can have a clear mind, but be physically handicapped to some extent, physically incapacitated due to minor strokes or post-operative effects, or they can be suffering from the increasingly debilitating
effects of an illness such as dementia or Alzheimer’s.

Care recipients can be cheerful and positive or frustrated at the loss of their independence and dignity.
Carers sometimes have to distinguish between doing what is necessary and doing too much. Doing too much is often the result of outside pressure or simply because it is quicker than getting the care recipient (patient)
to do something for themselves. A carer doing more than necessary can lead to a patient becoming needlessly sedentary and ultimately to a speedy downturn in their general health.

Keeping busy, feeling useful and being involved to the best of one’s abilities are the good ways to maintain or possibly create positive
thoughts and, in some cases, even improve physical health.

If a person is still capable of peeling and chopping vegetables, doing the washing up, taking out the compost, brushing the dog or
cat – let them.

Sure it might take a lot longer but the benefits to the patient are great and
ultimately the carer will feel less like a martyr as time goes on.
If the patient is ambulatory to any extent, don’t jump up to pass them something from the other side of the room. Let them get it
themselves – if they can get themselves to the toilet, they can get anywhere else in the house.

They maybe slow and frail, but they are still capable and quite often the more exercise they get, no matter how little or mundane, the
more they will be able to achieve on their own and feel more independent.
Stress on a carer, especially a full-time carer, can go beyond the obvious physical effects.

Most elderly people suffer loss of short-term memory, while retaining a crystal clear long-term memory. Hearing the same story told over and over or having to constantly reiterate something can be taxing for the most patient carer.
For carers dealing with serious disabilities such as dementia, Alzheimer’s and wheelchair or bed-ridden recipients, these scenarios and others are significantly increased.

There are many publications and associations that deal with the special needs of these more serious cases. Professional advice and support for carers can be sought through Carer Resource centres, Carer Respite centres, community groups or specific associations.

Carers Need to Take Care of Themselves

As any airline will tell you, if there is an emergency and oxygen levels drop in the cabin, put your own mask on first before dealing with others.

The premise of this is obvious – if you are not in a position of strength, you are not going to be any use to anybody when they need it most.
Carers need to take breaks, they need time on their own and they need
other outlets in their lives if they are going to be effective over time. Organise respite as far in advance as possible.

Except in emergencies, try not to wait until a break is essential. Sometimes a care recipient may be reluctant to accept that you need a break, so time is required for them to get used to the idea. They might need to meet or
see, well in advance, the person who will be caring for them in your absence or to visit a residential or day care centre.

Taking a break can also benefit the care recipient. When their normal carer is away they have the opportunity to interact with other
people, have new experiences, garner fresh stories to tell, have a fresh audience for much told anecdotes and a whole set of memories unrelated to the person they live with day in and day out.

There are a number of personal issues a carer needs to address, such as keeping healthy (exercising, getting enough sleep and eating well), staying in touch with friends, taking regular and planned breaks and putting
aside some time for relaxation – every day!

Another problem for carers is one of stubbornness on the part of the care recipient. It is usually very difficult for an aging person to
admit they are not as strong and capable as they once were and many, even those weakened by strokes, will steadfastly refuse to use
a walking stick or frame.

For their safety and your peace of mind it is imperative that you be firm on this point. “But I don’t need one,” is often the response. Try, “I understand your reluctance to use one but for my sake, please do it. I need to you use
one.” Tell them you need to relax a bit, to be less concerned all the time. If that doesn’t work, be ‘mean’, get a little cross, “Look, I can’t be with you all the time and it will give you more independence. I can’t even leave you
browsing in a shop in case you lose your balance,” etc.
At the start you may to be forever reminding them, “Where’s your stick?” But eventually it will become a habit and it will make the world of difference to both your lives.

Getting Away

While getting away on your own for a few hours, days or even taking a holiday is all important, the stress of caring can also be lessened by taking a break with the care recipient, preferably also with other family members. They say that a change is as good as a holiday, but if finances permit, a real holiday is a wonderful way to unwind and recharge batteries for both carer and recipient.

If it is possible to get away with family members or friends, the onus of care is shared and it is often found that the care recipient’s mental and physical condition improves with the extra stimulus and physical exertion.
If the patient’s condition allows, even marginally, a campervan is a wonderful way to travel as it is less crowded than a car, a wheelchair (for longer forays than the person can manage on foot) can be transported with ease and outside school holidays overnight stops can be taken without the need to book ahead.

Elderly people are often quite set in their ways and like to know where everything is – a campervan can become a little home-away from home without the need to acquaint themselves with new surroundings each night. Providing the van’s facilities are checked out in detail and camping grounds are selected according to the specific needs of the travellers eg handicapped facilities and bathroom rails, it can be a virtually stress-free and fun time away.

People and Facilities to Meet Your Needs

The Australian Government Carer Resource Centre and Respite Centres, provides support to carers. Similar services are available in New Zealand. The Carer Associations listed on this page also have information on respite services and it is important to note that there are different kinds of respite available and not all are provided through respite centres.

Respite services provide emotional support and counselling for carers as well as look after themselves, but are frail and not up to living entirely on their own 24 hours a day, there are many excellent electronic monitoring services available.

These privately owned companies provide a variety of home safety monitors which are linked directly back to base. The service is checked daily – generally a phone call is made to ensure the facility is working and if an emergency occurs, such as a fall, the patient just has to use a buzzer to call for assistance. To guard against false alarms, when the buzzer is pressed, the base will phone the recipient’s home. If the call is not answered, an ambulance is immediately dispatched to the premises. In Australia these companies can be found under Alerting Systems in your local yellow pages and in New Zealand under, Medical Alarms.

The information supplied above has come out of the Carers NSW Submission for State Budget 2004-5 and can be accessed along with further information through their website: www.carersnsw.asn.au